Self Confidence..

This is something I don't tend to share with people. I will most probably re-write this post many times before I actually publish it. 

 I just wanted to share how having multiple issues with my health has affected my mental health and how I look at myself. 
I often say 'I hate myself' and that's not because of what has happened, it is because of the way I look at myself. I wish I was able to look at myself and think wow I've been through alot and I'm still here, with my daughter amazing family and friends. 
But sometimes I cant. 
I am so self conscious.I question everything I do. I take pictures, and post them on Social Media, I guess searching for acceptance from other people as I haven't quite got there myself yet.
I seem to have such an issue when it comes to meeting new people and telling them about my trachy and all the things that have happened to me because, I worry that they will lose interest or will judge me for it. For some reason I see it as a negative, and I'm working so hard to try and make sure I come to accept it but it is difficult and I struggle daily. Which is another reason why I've started this blog. To understand myself and hopefully gain more confidence and own it. Also to be completely open, as I'm sure there will be people out there who suffer with self confidence issues for whatever reason, and we all need to remember no-one can be you, love yourself and the ups and downs as they have made you who you are.

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